Okay you know what I was just gonna reblog this and say nothing but you know what, I’m pissed off and you wanna know why?
Ted is a Nice Guy. I don’t mean a nice man, no. I mean the motherfucking “Nice Guy” who moans and complains about how women just won’t flock to him and be exactly who he expects of them. He knew from the beginning Robin wanted to focus on her career before marriage. He knew from the beginning she didn’t want kids. She rejected him time after time before they dated the first time. She rejected him time after time after that, for nine goddamn fucking years. His refusal to stop pursuing her, and accept she did not fucking love her, destroyed his relationship with Victoria TWICE. He is the whiny high school teenager bitching because the popular girl he obsesses over just isn’t into him. He is the goddamn Nice Guy, the kind whose every action, every so-called kind deed is done purely out of trying to get Robin to date him.
Robin motherfucking Scherbatsky was an independent woman who not only relied on herself, but expected the men she wanted to be with to be independent and rely on himself, as well. She was career-minded and strong and independent and self-reliant. Those were the traits that doomed her and Ted.
In this gifset we see that Ted did not respect Robin for who she was. He didn’t want her to be self-reliant—he wanted her to rely on him. He’s like so many men out there, so many Nice Guys. Baby, let me take care of you while you put me before everything else, You’re too independent, Robin. I need you to need me, I need you to rely on me. The reason they didn’t work out was because they both wanted and needed different things in relationships, and that’s okay—what isn’t okay is that instead of accepting that, Ted blames her. Tells her that SHE is the reason why they broke up, and something about her is WRONG. He insults her, tells her that her fundamental personality is wrong, and that she is why their relationship failed; that they they just aren’t compatible, no; because she is broken.
She is so upset at this she goes to another ex. He’s the Jerk, you know; the guy who all the Nice Guys in the world call The Asshole. And you know what? You know what this Asshole does? He comforts her, he compliments her. He tells her that those traits, teh traits she’s been belittled and taunted over, the traits that make her broken, the reason why She Can’t Find A Man, are what make her wonderful. Barney loved her for her insecurities, and he supported her independence. He supported her self-reliance. In one scene, this Asshole prove to be far more accepting and mature than the so-called Nice Guy.
So who do she end up with?
You know what else especially bothered me?
The fact that they pushed aside all of the Swarkles divorce by saying it wasn’t a failed marriage but a successful short-term one. I understand that divorce is a real thing. I understand that people stay friends after divorce. But I don’t think most people who’ve been divorced would consider their marriage “good while it lasted” and do nothing to fix it. Swarkles getting divorced may “have not been surprising” and “obvious cause it was Barney and Robin” but don’t tell me that it was a successful marriage. Successful marriages don’t break up. They would’ve worked it out if things were so great. THEY SHOULDN’T’VE NEEDED TO WORK IT OUT BECAUSE THEY WERE PERFECT AND THE DIVORCE WAS STUPID BUT THE FACT THAT THEY CALLED IT A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE SUCKED. I didn’t want “good while it lasted”. I wanted “tough but so worth it” and “doing it til they’re 85.” They wanted it to last forever, they wouldn’t’ve considered a mere 3 years enough. My Barney and my Robin were fighters. They were challenge and passion seekers; they found that in each other. Don’t give me some lame excuse like “it was great and it sucks but it happens.” No, after 9 years of character development and falling in love that does not happen. Bad writing happens.
Cobie Smulders and Neil Patrick Harris 2008.